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We’ve said it in the past, but in Bel Ami, Robert Pattinson has sex with everyone. Seriously.

We saw an early screening of Rob’s latest flick ( it hits theaters June 8 ) and—after peeping all those simmering pics of him and his many female costars—became slightly worried when his onscreen alter ego, George Duroy, wasn’t instantly bedding someone within the first 30 seconds of the movie.

But fear not, loyal R.Pattz lovers! Because while there’s talk of politics and money and plenty of newspaper business, Rob & Co. seriously deliver on the sexiness. Let us count the ways…

Let’s put it this way: If you’ve been dying to see Rob’s tush, you’re gonna! A couple times!

Like, say, exactly six minutes into the movie, when his French playboy scores his first hookup…with a hooker! And that might be the most revealing skin-on-skin scene of the whole movie, though far from the sexiest in our humble opinions.

It’s certainly sexier than the Breaking Dawn scene though, that’s for sure.

So we took this opportunity to rank for you the sex scenes into three categories:

Hottest Chemistry: Robert Pattinson and Christina Ricci

The first babe Rob beds post-prostitute is none other than Christina Ricci’s va-va-voom-worthy Clotilde de Marelle. The two quickly decide to shack up in a love nest together and get busy. Lots and lots of times.

Which means…more butt shots of our very own Edward Cullen! And some nudity from Ms. Ricci too, who was a standout among the cast. But their relationship turns from no strings attached to d-r-a-m-a, which means George must find a new gal. Like…

Most Awkward Sex Scene: Robert Pattinson and Uma Therman

Get ready to cringe. George gets his cougar on with the brassy broad Madeleine Forestier (played by Uma Thurman), who cares more about politics of the world than of the bedroom. Rob fans, her indifference in the libido department toward her hunky costar will drive you crazy—who would pass the Pattinson up?!

Until…the most awkward sex scene of the whole movie! In one shot that seems to last an eternity, the twosome has a very angry (and very clothed) quickie. And you may never be able to look at Rob the same way again.

Honorary Robbing of the Cradle Award: Robert Pattinson and Kristin Scott Thomas

We’ll be brief on this one and leave some of the juiciness for your personal viewing, ‘K? Good old Georgie gets his seduction on with Kristin Scott Thomas’ Virginie Walters…at a church. Cougar? This babe is more like a saber tooth. You’ll have to watch to see what goes down between these two.

But don’t think we spoiled all the sexy stuff. There’s plenty more going down between the sheets…you’ll just have to wait until the movie comes out to see it!

Our good friend @x_jEs_Si_Ca_x tweeted and shared with us,

@spunk_ransom I don’t know but this reminds to something Walking trough Ypswich UK during my fantrip and saw this=] http://pic.twitter.com/0OBu0CAc

This is classic! Thank you for thinking of us @x_jEs_Si_Ca_x!